Totally fawking sick and loaded with meds.
Just don’t let it be the piggy flu. D:
That is the perfect word to describe me now, since I’m always so uncertain and indecisive. But I’m generally happy right now, because I’m leaving this school in 3 weeks or so and my parents are listening to me… I will be getting a job until January and then continue my studies in NAFA.
I would be older by the time I complete my diploma but at least I would be more mature by then and my art would most probably have improved. Given the chance that I will most definitely have to work before I even start school for side income, I will most probably mature through that as well.. hopefully gain more company and judge myself better.
I’m supposed to do some basic animation now on Flash but I haven’t a clue how to go about doing this, so I’m taking the time to rp for a bit and do the worksheet and ppt – because that’s what I do best here.
I’m pretty much fine if I work full time after this semester because at least it fills some time and gain some experience and to add to my sadly lacking resume… Ah well. Life could be better, but I’m alright.
Then again, who actually really checks my blog and takes me seriously? I’m just a normal bored 17 year old who doesn’t even know what she wants and neglects everything just because of complacency. Always have been affecting me since the day I was born.
I’m bored. e_e
I’m still unmotivated too. I don’t want to go school anymore and I cannot write the Illias and Leanne fic and my Maths homework. I really can’t stand this procrastination period going on, it’s getting on my nerves as well as others.
I have a job opportunity now. Even then its a work from home sort of job, so it illustrates how very lazy I am.
Unmotivated post is unmotivated. I think I want to read some book and lay down on my bed now. e_e This sucks.
First time I chao-ed halway from school this semester even though there’s a test today. XD
Well… it’s not like it matters. I’m still being a good little girl by going to school at least. I listen to what people ask me to do… I hardly rebel. So fahck it. Meh.
I’ve been procrastinating the Illias and Leanne fic for too long and I got to complete it. Maybe listen to the Detroit Metal City soundtrack whilst at it… fitting songs for fitting fictions.
I think those who’ve seen how I am in class would surely know how much effort I put into my work, and lately my grades seem to have shown it. This is not outright bragging, I have to say, this is the truth and it is so much that I realise I am pretty much lacking in the friends department…
It’s just me. I tend to focus too much on getting good results that people just think I’m out for grades and not for personal relationships, friendships and all. (It probably explains why I’ve been single since Sec 2.) So I think from now on, I’m going to work as much as I can without sacrificing the friends which I would probably never see again, when I would go to NAFA next year.
I hope that this decision is pretty much final because looking at my parent’s financial situation I have doubts sometimes, and since going to such a school would be taxing financially, I hope that I will be able to pull through and get that fucking scholarship and do what I like, damn it.
Some people are happy doing things others lay out for them. I know I’m not meant for jobs which ask of them to comply and compromise, and sacrifice things like freedom for the sake of money and ranking. That’s why I would rather want to be an artist or a writer, in which I can still have freedom and be creative, any way I want.
Saying that, I’m not going to do my Arts Criticism UT since I would rather go to tuition on a non-schooling day, besides going halfway around Singapore again just to take a little test which wouldn’t ultimately benefit me at all.
On other things, I have decided to name my white grey fat hamster Cadmus since it’s like a hamster version of my vampire and he likes to nip my finger and all.
